To the Laziest Man In the Universe: Bring It

So I was really rushed today (as usual, I guess. I don't know why I bother to mention it anymore. It seems like evry single week I'm on here pretending like me not having time to do a real entry is something shocking. But it's not. You probably were just expecting the standard meme, and you'd be right to) so I didn't do a regular post, but I did do a meme. So here it is.

Anything Goes

What is the most expensive thing you've ever bought?
I'd have to go with our house. It's more expensive than all the cars and computers I've ever owned combined...times three.

First car you drove?
The first car I ever drove was one of the Brown's ranch trucks. I was 14 and had never driven a car in my life. They put me in the driver's seat, showed me how to get it into gear, and told me to follow the road around the mountain to the corrals. I couldn't have been going more than 25 miles an hour at any given time, but I was excited to be driving.

Is education important?
On a priority list I'd put education right after eating, breathing, and drinking water and long way ahead of things like knowing the names of anyone who is or ever has been on American Idol. Among the many needs of this country, one of the greatest is the need for educated citizens.

Person that means the most to you?
Would you be surprised if I told you it was Megan?

Rather live in the country or in a city?
I've lived both in the country and in the city and there are things to like about both. But now that I'm a married man, I would be content to get a decent house on a decent piece of land somewhere in the small towns of Arizona.

Favorite song you can listen to over and over?
There are too many to choose from, but I will say that I've listened to "Say It Ain't So" by Weezer hundreds of times since it was first released 14 years ago and it's still one of my all-time favorite songs. That's some pretty good staying power.

Favorite movie of all time?
I'm still going to go with Horsefeathers, which is a Marx Brothers movie. There's nothing to dislike about it and I've seen it more times than I dare count. The "I Always Get My Man" song and dance is always hilarious no matter how many times you see it.

Ever seen something online about you that was super bad?
I haven't ever seen anything anybody ever wrote about me that was bad, but that isn't to say people don't write, say, or think bad things about me. I've offended and hurt enough people in my lifetime that I'm sure someone out there has said something about it.

Best concert you've ever been to?
I don't know how to quantify that. I've seen Weezer six times, and every time I see them it's amazing. But I wouldn't think a non-Weezer fan would find it half as awesome as I do. The Black Keys absolutely blew my mind, but they had no stage show whatsoever. Reggie and the Full Effect had one of the best stage shows I've ever seen (with The Aquabats coming in a close second) but I wouldn't say it was the best I'd ever seen. I'll just go with the first time I ever saw Weezer. It was December 20th 1996 in the Electric Ballroom. That was also the firt time I ever saw Ash, and it was the first concert I ever paid to see.

Craziest night?
That would probably be the night Ezra stole a Pickelhaube (spiked German helmet) and we walked down Mill avenue and hung out with hippies, rastafarians, and had all sorts of near-magical experiences. Ezra was a crazy man and nearly any night with him was completely nuts. He had no sense of shame whatsoever and generally had a good time wherever he went.

Been to Disney World yet?
I've never been and I couldn't imagine it would be that much fun. The Disney corporation seems a bit scary to me these days. They seem a lot more soulless than when they started out. Walt Disney had dreams of the happiest place on earth and whatnot and now it's all moneymaking and cold corporate decision making. So if I were to go to Disneyland and see the people who are literally paid to smile (the scholarly term is "emotional labor") I would probably feel more creeped out than I would if I were in a place where everyone hated their job and let it show on their face.

Been grounded a lot when you were a teen?
I wasn't really grounded as a teenager. I was punished in different ways. My parents always said, and I agree with them, that grounding a kid is a punishment to the parents as well because they have to look at their kid moping and sulking about for two solid weeks. Who wants that? It's better to take away privelidges or have them do unpaid chores.

Do you believe punishment really makes a person better?
Punishment in and of itself can't make anybody better. It tends to have the adverse effect. How a person deals with and learns from punishment is what makes all the difference in whether or not punishment is effective.

Should people that hurt animals have the same done to them?
No. Wait, let me check...am I insane? Nope. Not insane. Hurting animals for no reason is a bad thing to do, but animals are not humans. Let me say that again so everybody understands: animals are not humans. That cop whose dog died in the hot car shouldn't spend a single day in jail. Why wreck his life for the life of a dog? There's no sense in it. But consider this: humans are part of the food chain. There are animals who eat us, and there are plenty of animals we can eat. It's part of the system. There are many animals which are absolutely delicious and we shouldn't have a congressional hearing every time someone fries up a bit of a delicious animal. It's nonsensical. There needs to be a moderate voice of reason somewhere between those who think killing animals is worse than killing babies and those who think killing animals should be a daily pastime. So the idea that people who mistreat animals should have the same done to them is insane. What if I felt strongly about the pain plants feel (there are studies that show plants feel some level of pain) when vegetarians eat them. Should I be allowed to stick a fork into every vegetarian who sticks a fork in a salad? The whole idea is moronic.

Best music to listen to?
Power pop. There's no contest. Put on a great power pop band like Jellyfish or The Rubinoos and all your cares melt away. The only way you could help but like it is if you're the sort of person who only likes depressing and/or angry music. Metalheads and goths, I'm looking right at you. Some of your music is good, but lighten up and listen to something else every now and again.

Best halloween costume?
Former Canadian Prime Minister Kim Cambell.

Ever been told a tall tale?
Everything the boss man says is as unbelievable as a tall tale.

Were you spoiled as a child?
Nope. I was the middle child and middle children are never spoiled. We grow up to be normal and well-adapted members of society (comparitively speaking, of course).

Favorite food to eat?
These days I'm a big fan of tacos. But the magic of the quesadilla still calls to me from time to time.

Things you do for fun?
Like walking in the rain and the snow when there's nowhere to go and you're feelin' like a part of you is dying, and you're looking for the answer in her eyes. You think you're gonna break up then she says she wants to make up.

Wait, that's what we do for Love. For fun I play video games, light fires (contained fire pit fires, not arson), listen to music, watch movies, and just generally hang out with the wife. It's a good life.

Ever been to a party that cops busted?
The cops caught us for lighting a big old fire and setting off all sorts of fireworks in the desert. Jacob took the fall on that one, which is to say he got the lecture and we all stood and watched. Nobody got hauled in or anything.

Do you do drugs?
Nope. I don't even like to take ibuprofin for a headache. I'll take something if I'm really sick, but I don't like to.

Best cellphone provider?
None. Cell phone quality is way worse than landline quality. They all stink equally.

Ever dye your hair a odd color?
I dyed it green once and purple once. Those were both temporary dyes. I've never gone with an odd color for more than a couple days.

Who's your idol?
I have a few. Of course I always look up to my parents, but you'd expect that. I also think Rivers Cuomo, Mats Sundin, and David P. Chandler are pretty remarkable people.

Who's better guys as friends or girls?
This is a middle school question, so my only response can be: boys go to mars to get more candy bars. Girls go to jupiter to get more stupider.

Who really does the most cheating guys or girls?
I don't know. I'm a one woman man and I can't imagine being otherwise. I intend to never cheat and I'm sure Megan is the same. I can't speak for anyone else.

How many states have you lived in?
I've only lived in Arizona. Luckily, Arizona is the greatest state in the Union.

Do you think you're friendly?
Not really. I can be pretty awkward in social situations and sometimes I don't come off well at all. Also, I have a hard time pretending to be civil when I'm just not feeling it. If I'm angry, it usually shows, so that makes it a little hard to say I'm friendly. But I try to be friendly...at times.

How much does it cost for you to fill up your gas tank?
About $34 these days.

Ever ran over an animal?
Yeah. Apparantly the deal is off between me and birds. I've been killing them left and right, though I don't intend to.

Rode on a horse?
I've been in the saddle for days at a time. I've been on cattle drives and overnight horseback trips and whatnot. So yeah, I can ride.

Rode on a motorcycle?
I learned to ride a little on a friend's motorcycle. I wouldn't trust myself on the open road, though.

Whats the longest you have been stuck in a car?
Probably those family trips up to Utah in the old station wagon. Christine and I had to sit in the backwards seat, isolated from everyone else. She was so car sick she'd usually be throwing up into her puke bucket (an empty plastic margarine tub) before we even got out of the driveway. Those trips were always exciting at first, and agonizing for the bulk of time. I don't see how the padres did it. Those trips seemed like they lasted a million years.

How do you feel about politics?
I feel good. Bush is going to be gone soon(without even ushering in the apocalypse. So it wasn't a complete failure) and we actually have some good candidates this time 'round. I'll be happily casting my ballot for someone and not against their opponent. So that's nice.

On a sunny day, your most likely doing what?
I'm most likely to be found giving lectures on the difference between "your" and "you're." It boggles my mind that people have gotten past 5th grade without knowing which to use in any given situation.

Are you comfortable with yourself?
Sure. I know me pretty well by now, so I can hang out with me without it being weird or awkward.

Anything that has ever scared the life out of you?
Yeah, when nearly half of the democrats thought that Hillary "Lies Her Pants Off" Rodham Clinton would make a good presidential candidate.

Like going to clubs?
Nope. They don't usually play the sort of music I like to hear and I'm too old for any sort of dancing that requires gyrating without looking like a complete idiot.

Favorite type of movie to watch?
I like comedies. Call me crazy, but I like to laugh and enjoy myself.

Sport you like to play?
Hackey sack, racquetball, or roller hockey. Though I haven't done any of those in a while.

Had your heart broken?
I had my heart broken a few times over the years, but luckily it wasn't permanent. As The Mooney Suzuki says, "The broken heart can be made whole." And so it has.

Ever seen a weird bug and you didn't know what it was?
Yeah. They have some odd ones in Cambodia. I just tried to keep my distance.

Best shampoo out there?
Alberto VO5. It's a buck a bottle.

Want to go to the moon?
If someone else pays for it, sure.

What do you order at McDonald's?
A hot fudge sundae. Megan and I only go for the ice cream.

Robots Don't Go to Heaven

Hey everybody. I figured what with me having a few spare moments here at work, I'd update you on all the whatnots and such of this past weekend. As you probably know by now, Friday was Megan's last day at work. Considering the fact that we don't have enough savings to keep going for too long, we're both fairly non-worried about the whole thing. We brought our tithing up to date on Sunday and we figure things will work out if we do what we're supposed to and put in our own efforts. So it'll be interesting to see how this will all shake out.

So I got a call from Megan on Friday right before we were both about to leave work. She had arranged with her parents to go out to dinner and a movie. We left right after work and drove to Glendale where we all met up. We went out to dinner Caramba's, which is a Mexican restaurant I'd never been to. The food was pretty good. By the time we were all done, we still had time to kill before heading to the dollar theater. We dropped by a K-Mart near the theater to kill a few minutes. I hadn't been in a K-Mart since the one in Thatcher was going out of business and was selling CD's for $5. Come to find out, K-Mart is almost exactly like Wal-Mart except nobody shops there. That's actually a major plus for K-Mart. I would say that this would be the start of a new shopping trend for me...if only I knew where a K-Mart was. Question: do you know where the K-Mart is in your neighborhood, and if so, have you ever been inside? Yeah, I didn't think so.

After K-Mart, we made our way to the dollar theater. The dollar theater in Glendale is a lot nicer than the one in Mesa. It looks like the inside of a spaceship built by aliens with a fascination for disco. We had chosen to go see the new X-Files movie. Actually, Megan and I kinda wanted to see it more than our other options, and since Richard and Carol had no strong opinion on the matter, we all shuffled in to X-Files. The X-Files movie was, admittedly, a bit odd and not super great for people who aren't already fans of the show. They don't really explain who the characters are or why they do what they do. So if you don't know anything about the show, all you get is a movie about organ harvesting and body transplants, which is kind of disturbing. Plus there's a whole side-plot of priest molestation and whatnot. It's a dark movie. In retrospect, I think Megan and I enjoyed the movie a lot more than we would have otherwise because her parents hated it. We probably would've been better off if we had all gone to see Kung-Fu Panda, but whaddaya do?

When we went to bed on Friday night, I was afraid that I might have nightmares about organ harvesting and body transplants, but I didn't. Megan had a dream with a headless body in it, so that was the worst of it. But enough with the decapitation and whatnot. Last week my Atari 2600 decided to give up on me. We had all the in-laws over for dinner and I had gotten some of the brothers-in-law into the entertainment room to play some 4-player Warlords. The old 2600 just wasn't getting any juice and try as I might, nothing was happening. It had been having issued with a loose power jack for a while, but on that particular day there was nothing I could do to get it going. I had wanted to fix it all week, but we were house-sitting and I didn't get the chance. So on Saturday I drove Megan all around looking for an Atari part. I picked up a spare power supply earlier in the week, but that didn't help anything, so I knew it was the jack.

I took the Atari apart (which was surprisingly simple) and unsoldered (desoldered? reverse-soldered?) the jack from the circuit board. It's basically a mono 3.5mm headphone jack with three terminals on the bottom. I would have though that someone might carry such an animal, but nobody did. We went to two Radio Shacks and we even dropped by Fry's, but to no avail. I then realized that I should've started at the dungeon of geeks, because they have dead consoles all over the store and they are usually more than happy to part them out.

So I dropped into the dungeon of geeks and Megan went into the hoochie fashion center next door. The geek on command basically talked to me like I was an idiot. He told me to go wire the power supply directly to the circuit board. When I asked him how (because it's two wires coming from the power supply going into three holes on the board). He told me not to worry about the third hole because it's for the ground, which is not important because the powers supply is only 9 volts. He said he'd seen many Atari's wired this way. I must say, however, that he was wrong about the third hole. It isn't for the ground. It actually completes the circuit. Inside the jack is a little spring that compresses when the power supply is plugged in, completing the circuit and allowing the Atari to get juice. I officially know more about how to power an Atari than the geek in command. I don't know whether to be proud or to punish myself.

Anyway, when we got home I tried wiring the power supply directly to the board at least 6 different ways (I really should've used a multimeter and done it right the first time, but I don't have such things at my disposal). I got nothing every single time, which worried me a bit. I felt like a surgeon whose patient was flatlining on the operating table. It was like House except...you know...watchable. Before too long BJ and Shannon came over to drop off Megan's old bed (which is going into our spare oom so that when people like Paul come and spend the night they'll get an actual bed to sleep on) and whisk us away to the Hansen family get-together.

All of Megan's fam that live in the valley got together in Glendale for a labor day weekend pot luck. My attempts to watch a little college football were not fruitful, but there were only two sports fans among us (me and BJ) so needless to say, we didn't win out. The food was good and we had a pretty good time. For most of the time we were there all I could think about were the two wiring configurations I hadn't tried on the Atari (configurations that I would've tried first if I had thought about what I was doing before the soldering iron got hot. Oh, and I should also probably mention that I burnt myself with the soldering iron, and I also burnt Megan as well when she was holding a wire for me. I've been using a soldering iron since I was 12 and I've never had such back luck with it). BJ and Shannon didn't stay at the shindig too long, and they were our ride. So I got home in plenty of time to fix the Atari. I wired it up one more time, this time bypassing the hole for the spring-loaded circuit completer bit. I really didn't expect it to work, but it was my last option. When I plugged it in the board didn't fry, much to my surprise, and when I pushed the power switch the old machine came back to life. I could've wet myself I was so surprised and excited. I was actually pretty proud of myself despite the fact that I could've done it right the first time if I had really thought about it and not been so clumsy with the soldering iron. But I guess you live and learn. The next time I pull an Atari apart, I should have a much better idea of what I'm actually doing. So there ya go.

On Sunday Megan and I went to church as usual. We're really settling into the ward quite nicely. We forgot to bring our tithing check to church, so we slipped out before Sunday School and picked it up. I miss Sunday School a lot these days. I'm usually in the clerk's office requesting and pushing membership records. I got our tithing into the envelope and into the hands of a member of the bishopric. Then I sat down and did a little clerk work. I'm starting to get the hang of a few things now, so that's good.

After church I got the chance to do something I'd never done before and probably won't be doing too often: count tithing. I've seen Dad in the clerk's office working on tithing more than a few times, so it was a little weird to be doing it myself. I was entering the tithing amounts in the computer and Brother Powell (a member of our bishopric) was opening and sorting the envelopes. It was a little weird to enter my own tithing, but I guess I should get used to it.

After tithing, Megan and I headed over to her former roommate, Janae's, for dinner. They were supposed to have a couple other people over, but Megan and I were the only ones who showed up. So we got to chow down on a good pork tenderloin and some good cornbread. There was apparantly a salad too, but that sort of food is invisible to me, much in the same way that Taco Bell is. I just found out two days ago that I have a Taco Bell less than a half mile from my house. I wouldn't normally take note of this because when I see a Taco Bell, I don't see something that says, "There's food that you can eat here." I guess it's the same with salads. I just don't see it as a viable food source, so it is basically invisible to me.

On Monday Megan and I slept in for quite a while. Megan is doing this coupon saving thing so we can get our food cheap (it's tied in to a website where they help you maximize your coupons) so she was up and clipping coupons and I took the time to put some more Atari games on disk. So what ended up happening was that I was in my pajamas for most of the morning and into the afternoon. I got pretty much all the games I could think to put on a disk and Megan got us some cheap groceries, so that was a success.

We decided we had to get out of the house because for one, it's lame to be inside all day on labor day and secondly, I get a headache if I go a day without seeing the outside world. We dropped by DI, but they were closed because of the Holiday, so we had to go to Savers. I tell you, DI is so much better than most thrift stores. But we found a couple blank tapes (I'm constantly collecting blank cassette tapes so Megan and I can have music to drive to) and the USB cable we needed so Megan and I don't have to swap one cable between two printers. So our thrifting was a success. We also dropped by the reptile store. That's always a good time. They still have plenty of African Spurred tortoises, and Megan and I still want to get a couple. Turbo isn't doing too great these days and he's about half as big as he should be. I love that guy, but I really worry about him sometimes. Anyway, if Megan and I weren't tightening the ol' belt we could've easily picked out the two tortoises we would've taken home. But things being what they are, we just window shopped. Luckily the reptile store provides some of the best window shopping in the universe, so that's good.

When we got home, Megan and I decided to have us a little backyard weenie roast for dinner. We fired up the fire pit and burned away another good section of one of our dead trees. It was nice to be sitting in my own back yard with a good fire going and my wife at my side. The married life is so much better than the single life was. We had our hot dogs and the best smores I've ever had in my life and watched the fire die down to coals. All in all it was a fantastic weekend.

Oh, one last thing I'll mention: I finished my summer baseball reading. I read "Shoeless Joe" by W.P. Kinsella and "The Natural" by Bernard Malamud. I finished "Shoeless Joe" last week, and I was very impressed. The story seems even less probable in the book than it does in the movie, which makes it all the more magical. Also, the writer Ray picks up is J.D. Salinger, not the fictional Terrence Mann. It makes a big difference.

As for "The Natural," which I just finished today, the dust is still settling on that one. As you must know, the book ends way differently than the movie does. The movie is all about redemption, but the book is all about disillusion and the fall of heroes. Honestly, I found the book fairly depressing in the end. We have so few true heroes in baseball now and I don't need to be reminded of the impurities of the sport and its athletes. But I can't say the book wasn't well-written and I do feel differently about how the movie ends now that I've read the book. It would be like seeing the movie version of "The Count of Monte Cristo" and getting the message that you can get caught up in revenge and your life will turn out just fine and then you read the book and get the message that a person seeking revenge will never be at peace and will never be happy. It's a night and day difference. I think I have to watch "Field of Dreams" and "The Natural" now and compare them to their respective books. So there ya go, baseball books and their movie versions.

Anyway, I think that's all you need to know about this last weekend. Even if it isn't I'm going to stop because Megan and I are going to watch Monk now.

Far Behind the Forest of Flying Paper Airplanes

Howdy doody everybody. Once again I fully intended to do a regular entry, but I have no time left for that. So

Details of My Life

If you got married to your most best guy friend, would you be happy?
Well, I had the pleasure of marrying my best friend. Of course you know Megan isn't a guy. If I married my best guy friend I would be pretty upset because I think I've proven beyond reasonable doubt that I'm not gay.

What did you do this afternoon?
I sat at a desk with a bored look on my face.

When was the last time you smiled?
I think it was when I saw two guys arguing about whether or not Cedric Ceballos could see through the blindfold in the 1992 dunk contest. I remember hearing the guys arguing about that back in the day. It's nice to see that the jury is still out on that one.

Can you use chopsticks?
I can use chopsticks like a champion.

Who was the last person you slept next to?
The only person I sleep next to is Megan.

What do you order from taco bell?
I haven't been inside a Taco Bell in over 10 years. I don't even know what they sell anymore, but if it tastes as bad as it used to, you can have your taco smell. I'll eat almost anywhere else.

Do you still talk to the person you fell hardest for?
Yeah, and I married her. I don't know if any of the other people I've fallen for over the years were any harder than the first two go-rounds with Megan, but all those other girls were married before round 3 with Megan and I didn't have a regret for any of them. And somehow when Megan and I started hanging out again, I found myself still having feelings for her. So I think if time is a factor, Megan takes the cake in a big way.

Do you remember what you were like a year ago?
Megan and I had only been dating for a few months a year ago, but I already knew I was going to marry her. I was a little rougher around the edges then and was generally a little more temperamental, but I think she's really helped me improve since then.

Do you have unlimited texting?
I still don't use the word "text" as a verb. It's still a noun to me. I think that should answer the question.

Ever cried because of happiness?
I wept like a girl when I was on the mission. We were singing "Called to Serve" at the end of a zone conference and it just struck me how much I loved being a missionary. I could barely sing I was crying so much.

Anything you're giving up on?
I'm giving up on my hope that the Cardinals will be any good this year. My official prediction for them this year, as it is with every year, is that they will go 10-6 and win a single playoff game. This year I say that, as I do every year, but I don't put any stock in it. Kurt Warner is not the answer we're looking for, and Matt Leinert isn't stepping up. It's sad, really.

Whose pool did you last swim in?
The last time I swam was in the pool at Megan's old house.

Are you planning on throwing a party this summer?
Well, we really didn't throw any parties this summer, and now the summer is gone. So the answer is no. But we fully intend to have people over and have a good time somewhere in the near future.

How was last week?
Not the best. Last week was when Megan found out she was losing her job. Of course we're dealing with it pretty well, but it makes things a little uneasy.

What could you go for right this second?
A weekend. A long, relaxing weekend. It's a good thing I have one just an hour away.

What are your plans for the morning?
Which morning? Tomorrow morning I'm going to sleep in, and then I'm going to put more Atari games on the 5.25" disks I just got off ebay. I got 23 disks for 3 bucks. It was a steal.

Do you ever turn off your cellphone?
Yes. Lucky for me, though. I don't give the number out to too many people, so it really doesn't ring all that often.

Do you like certain romantic cliches?
Megan and I are a romantic cliche. We have often joked that our story could be easily made into a romantic comedy.

Where is your best friend at this exact moment?
Megan is still at work. Today is her last day, which is a little weird for both of us.

Do you have a ceiling fan located in your room?
There's no ceiling fan in our bedroom, but we have a little fan to keep things cool.

What is the worst thing that has happened to you lately?
I think Megan losing her job has to top that list. If you've read her entry about it, we're keeping things in perspective and we're not freaking out about it. Even though it may turn into a good thing (Megan will get the chance to bone up on web design and flash animation, which will make her more employable down the line) it still might be a bad thing in the short term. I'm staying hopeful, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't at least a little concerned.

What color is your car?
It's a metallic grey that the clear coat is peeling off of.

What sounds are you currently hearing?
I hear only a small fan blowing at the back of my head. I should go turn it off.

Have you told anybody you loved them today?
I told Megan before I left for work. But that comes as no surprise. I have to say, I thought there'd be more interesting questions in here or that I'd at least come up with some more interesting answers, but it just isn't happening.

Do you miss anyone?
I miss Megan and I miss Turbo. Lucky for me, I'll be seeing them both soon.

Are you growing apart from someone close?
I think I'm growing apart from all my single friends, which is something I thought would happen. I'm fine with it. I've had generations of friends come and go in my life, only few of whom ever resurface later on. But it is a different world as a married person, which is exactly what I expected. Megan says it's like a different dimension. The same people are there and it seems the same, but somehow you know it's all different. You see your single friends but you interact with them differently than you did when you were single. It's a different dimension.

How much are you on the phone daily?
Less than 5 minutes. I don't like talking on the phone and I tend to keep things brief.

Are you in a good mood?
I'd say so. I'm going to hit this three day weekend like a tonne of feathers in about 40 minutes, so I'd say everything is hunky dory.

Have you ever been in love?
I am currently in love and it is my intention to stay that way for the rest of eternity. So far so good.

Do you love your life?
I'd say so. It has its ups and downs, but it's been good to me so far.

Who do you trust with EVERYTHING?
This questionnaire was obviously made for single people. Of course I trust Megan more than I trust anyone else in the universe. She knows the absolute worst things about me and loves me anyway. There's nothing I can't trust her with.

What will you be doing in 3 hours?
Relaxing. Ooh, I can't wait.

What were you doing at midnight last night?
Sleeping. We had to get up early this morning so we could pack and put the house we're sitting back in order. I was probably snoring like a Swedish lumberjack at midnight.

What is your background on your phone?
On the outside I have a picture of Megan and on the inside I have a picture of Turbo climbing over his house. Megan debated with me over whether or not she should be on the inside, but the way I figure, she's on the outside so she's the first thing people see when they look at my phone.

Where is your favorite place to shop?
It used to be Hoodlum's, which was more than just a store. It was something akin to an oasis of awesome in a desert of crazy. But now it's gone. I think I'd have to toss it up between Eastside Records and Bookman's, but I haven't been to Eastside in a long time.

What is your favorite thing to wear?
Oddly enough, I really like my orange Hoodlum's t-shirt. It's a good color and it shows I supported the best record store on earth.

Do you think you are a good driver?
No. I'm not a good driver. But I'm a conscientious driver because I know I'm not a good driver, so you're probably safer with me on the road than any of these lunatics who think they're good drivers. I heard a statistic that 75% of Americans consider themselves above average drivers. With a decent distribution, more than half of the drivers in this country should be average or below average. So I would venture to guess that about 50% of the drivers you see on the road are either mediocre or bad drivers who think they're good. Call me crazy but I'd rather be behind a bad driver who knows his limitations than a bad driver who has delusions of goodness and drives like a maniac.

Could you go a day without eating?
It's called fast Sunday, and not only can I do it, but I can do it without whining (a feat I thought I'd never acheive in my early days of fasting).

Who was the last person you talked to on the telephone?
Megan. She's about the only person I call these days.

Were you happy when you woke up today?
Yeah. It's Friday and I'll be sleeping in my own bed tonight. What's not to like about today?

Are you ticklish?
I think I'll go ahead and use my 5th ammendment rights on this one.

First thing you do when you wake up?
Go get a drink of water. I'm usually parched when I wake up.

What's on your bedroom floor right now?
Clothes. Lots and lots of clothes.

Ever talked to someone that was drunk?
I've talked to people who have taken a number of substances both legal and ill. Most of them keep asking me the same question over and over. It's actually pretty boring.

Do you trust people easily?
I tend to trust way too much way too early and it has bitten me in a big way sometimes. If I was ever able to collect on all the money I've lost being a trusting guy, Megan might not have to fine a new job.

Do any of your jeans have rips, tears, and holes in them?
Some of them do, but they were put there by me and my crazy jean tearin' lifestyle, not by some machine in the pants factory.

How many pillows on your bed?
Two. One for me and one for Megan. I can't do multiple pillows because I get a kink in my neck, and I can't do down pillows because they poke me in the face and go flat in the middle. So gimme a regular pillow stuffed with some sort of synthetic and I'll be asleep in no time. If you made it to the end of this meme without needing to use your pillow, give yourself a gold star.

Not to worry . . .

Well the trouble my company's been having hasn't improved at all. In fact it's gotten a lot worse. As a result they had to let me go on Wednesday. They've been letting people go slowly based on where the need is and who's been the the least amount of time. Since there are two designers and I've only been there since February my number was up.

Downside
The down side is that I'm really going to miss the people I work with. I've gotten pretty close to the girl I share an office with. After we found out on Wednesday we both sat and cried a bit like girls are allowed to do. We'll stay in touch I'm sure, but it is rare to find working situations where you love your job and your coworkers.

Optimistic Upside
Well, there are a couple of upsides actually.

1. They are letting me stay for the rest of the month so I can have an income while looking for a new job. They are also giving my as much time off as I need to go to interviews or whatever else I need.

2. I've just finished one free lance job with another in the works and we're house sitting next week, so we've got alternate sources on income coming in the next couple of weeks.

3. We've got a plan that will hopefully get me back working without missing a day of income.
I started the process of getting myself registered as a substitute teacher two years ago to kill time while I was looking for a design job. This means I've got my fingerprint card which is the most time consuming part of the whole process. Today I ordered my official transcripts from ASU and they'll be ready on Monday. If I drop all the paperwork off at the Department of Education, I should be a certified substitute teacher by the end of the day. I can use the rest of the week registering myself with the different school districts in the valley. Since there is always a shortage of teachers, sub jobs come by pretty easy. My dad has been a substitute teacher for the past five years and hardly misses a day during the school year.
The great part of the master plan is that I'll only have a six hour work day which will leave me extra time to learn more web design and flash. This will make me a much more competitive designer. I'm excited because I've really wanted to learn flash and this is the perfect opportunity for me to do so. The dance company I do freelance work for would like me to redo the header on the top of the page. I'm going to see if I can work out a deal with her to redesign her website at a discounted rate. This will allow me to gain experience and have a decent portfolio piece.

I'm really grateful I had this job-no matter how short of a time it was. I really think it was where I needed to be at the time. I feel really good about the direction things are going. Today my coworker and I were talking about life and how if your doing the best you can, you'll always be taken care of. She's not a member of the church, but we've been able to have really great gospel discussions about life and love and all sorts of stuff. I'm really going to miss that.

So not to worry.

We've got lots of faith that everything is going to be OK and we'll still be able to make ends meet.

On a different note, I'm really excited about a website I've become a member of called the grocery game. The site couples up the deals the different grocery stores are having with the coupons that come in the Sunday paper. With the combination of in store specials and Sunday coupons allows you to get a select number of items free and a whole bunch of stuff 50-90% off. The idea is to stock up on items when they are really cheap so you don't have to pay more for them later. Last week James and got a free loaf of bread. I've just started, so I don't have my three months of coupons built up get, but I'm super excited about it. If anyone is interest, the website is www.thegrocerygame.com.

I'm pretty excited to have the weekend in front of us. James has to work for a few hours tomorrow which really stinks, but we'll still have most of the day. I'm anxious to get some cleaning done. It's not too bad because my wonderful husband cleaned the kitchen, did the dishes and some laundry on Wednesday when I got laid off. Man I love that guy! We could still use to do some ward work and clean the rest of the house though.

I never thought I would be so excited to be clipping coupons and pull weeds in all my life.

Well, you cats have a great weekend and I'll talk to you later.

Megan

Friday...or Not

Hey everybody. Sorry I haven't been updating as regularly as we'd all like (well, I guess I can't speak for you, but I sorta wish I updated more regularly). I can honestly say that my update today isn't the important one. I happen to know that Megan has an update in the works and it will be much more of interest than any fluff I might churn out. So look for hers and bug her until she puts it up.

So today didn't feel like Friday at all. It didn't feel like Friday mainly because I have to go into work tomorrow. It is beyond rediculous that I should be working on Saturday. I really can't go into a full-on session of rage about how rediculous it is that I'll be working, but suffice it to say that my anger is brought on not by the fact that I have to work, but that in being asked to work I have been lied to repeatedly and people who actually want to work and need the money and have come in multiple times asking if they can work are not being allowed to work. It stinks. Let's leave it at that, shall we?

But there was a silver lining today as there will surely be one tomorrow: skeletor and the head librarian weren't there. Things are so much better when my coworker and I are unsupervised. We get more done, we actually enjoy ourselves, and the time really flies. So if things go as they should, I will be able to be in and out of work before my brain realizes that I'm in a place I really shouldn't be in on a weekend.

Well, this is waxing rediculous, so I think it's time to just kick it to the meme. Take 'er away meme.

My State Of Mind

On a scale from 1 to 10, how good are you at Guitar Hero?
I have never played guitar hero, and if things go as I plan I never will. I think it's more fun to actually pick up an instrument that you actually know how to play and make actual music. But I know I'm living in the stone ages with thinking like that.

What tv show do you watch most?
These days Megan and I are chugging our way through the 5th season of Monk. I don't know what show we're going to do next, but whatever it is, it'll be good.

Do you have a job?
Yeah. Someday I hope to have a job I don't hate.

If you had a paid vacation to anywhere in the world, where would you go?
I think we all know. I would love to be able to take Megan to Cambodia and let her see what I've been rattling on and on about all these years.

Do you think the guy should always pay?
No. I love it when a woman pays every now and again, especially because almost every woman I've taken out in the last 8 years made more money than I did. But I do believe that a guy should open doors and be a gentleman in all things. But going dutch or having the girl offer to pay is just awesome sometimes.

Have you ever wanted to be on a game show?
Yeah. I have a large cache of worthless knowledge. I might make a bit of money on a game show.

Randomly click on a song from your playlist. What's the first line of that song?
The song I randomly clicked on was "Ole" by The Bouncing Souls. The first English words in the song are "Bouncing Souls no one can beat us. We drink beer and wear adidas." Truer words have never been spoken. I would also like to say that few punk bands are as good to watch live as The Bouncing Souls.

Who was your first kiss?
Amey Durfee. It's really funny to think back on it. It's really kind of an embarassing story, so I won't go into it.

Describe your dream house.
Paid for. Seriously, I think I would hate living in a super huge or overly fancy house. I don't want to live in a house that feels more like a museum, where I'm not allowed to touch anything. I want a house that feels like home and I'd like it to be paid for. Is that so much to ask?

Where did you last go out to eat?
I had a Circle K hot dog today. It was delicious.

Have you ever been in a car wreck?
I was once in a car that had a blowout on the freeway. We slammed into the median and messed up the side of the car a bit. Oddly enough, earlier that day we had another flat tire and the windshield was smashed by a branch that randomly fell off a tree. It was a bad day for driving. Lucky for me, I wasn't behind the wheel so it seemed like some incredibly hard to believe movie.

What do you plan on naming your baby girl?
As far as I know, I'm not having a baby of any sort right now. Megan and I are pretty sure she's not pregnant. But Megan like Bible names like Esther, Rachel, Ruth, etc. and I can dig it.

Your baby boy?
Jimmy jr. I thought we'd been over this. But seriously, I want a son to have my name, but I don't want to inflict a nickname on him.

What's your musical guilty pleasure?
I really like the song "Rock Ya Body" by M.V.P. It's exactly the kind of rap music I don't like, but there's something about that song that is irresistable for some reason.

What was the last book you read?
Sheesh, I think the last book I actually finished may have been "Now I Can Die in Peace" by Bill Simmons. I need to read more.

How long does your morning routine take?
I can do it in under 15 minutes if I have to (under 5 in a pinch) but if I have time, like I normally do, I use all the time I have. So if I have an hour I'll loaf for 45 minutes and then get everythng together in the last 15 minutes.

What is the dumbest thing you've ever done?
Now there's a pit without a bottom. I was a kid in a small town, so we had to invent our fun (which, for you city kids, is a lot more fun than anything all y'all ever did. Seriously). So I did things with fire, trucks, horses, etc. that were pretty dumb. I can't say that any of them was any dumber or smarter than any other. Is car jousting dumber than puring every flammable substance you can find into a can and lighting it? I dunno.

Do you return the buggies at Wal-Mart?
You get buggies at Wal-Mart? Or do you mean the shopping carts? I'm try to be a decent person and return my cart most of the time.

What is your favorite fast food place?
Fili B's.

Do you have any plans for tomorrow?
Yeah. I'm going to go to work and make sure the library is open for all the people with nothing better to do.

Are there any movies you've seen more than ten times?
Mystery Men, Saving Silverman, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, The Princess Bride, The Garfield Halloween Special, Army of Darkness. There might be others, but those are the ones that come to mind at the moment.

What are your biggest pet-peeves?
I was just thinking about that yesterday. I don't think I have as many as I used to. Having a wife has really taken the edge off of a lot of my old aggressions. I know large furry boots and gigantic googly grandma sunglasses drive me up the wall still. People who endanger my life by talking on the phone while driving still get to me. But I don't think I get as peeved in general as I used to.

Why is your boyfriend/girlfriend your boyfriend/girlfriend?
I don't have a girlfriend. I upgraded and got a wife, which is way better. But she's my wife because I love her and because she said yes.

What do you usually eat for breakfast?
A granola bar.

Do you like to cook?
Not really, but I'll throw down some cooking every now and again. I cooked noodles for us last night, and I made the tacos a couple weeks ago. Yeah, tacos and noodles. I should have my own cooking show.

What music genres could the world do without?
It would be wrong to say the world could do without a musical genre regardless of how much it annoys me. Rap metal, for example, drive me nuts (with the notable exceptions of Faith No More and certain 311 songs) but it is a true expression for the artists who make the music and the fans who consume it. Sure, industry demands and clear channel interference factor in a bit, but when it comes down to it, music is expression and I'm not the sort of person to say that any person should not be allowed to express the things they think or feel no matter how much they annoy me personally. Whether or not I should be subjected to crappy music in public places is a different matter, but crappy music certainly has the right to exist. So there you go Alanis Morrisette, I just defended your right to put out the most annoying and whiney sounds on the planet. I hope you appreciate what I do.

What do you want to do for the rest of your life?
This is a question I have thought about a lot lately. I know things that I would like to do, but they're all mutually exclusive. So just pretend you've shaken a magic 8-ball and the answer came back, "Ask Again Later."

Do you get along with your siblings?
Yeah. They're all good people.

Are you good at Sudoku puzzles?
I don't even know how to do sudoku, and I'm certainly not going to learn now.

Are you a pack-rat?
Unfortunately I did inherit a bit of that gene, but I also have the gene that enjoys clearing things up and throwing away junk. So every now and again I'll throw pack-ratedness to the wind and throw stuff away. It works for me.

How late did you sleep this morning?
I was up at 6:00. I had another nightmare that Turbo died (second one this month) so I got up when my alarm went off, got a drink, and checked to make sure Turbo was ok. I think I'll be crushed if our little guy ever gives up on life.

Are you a creative person?
I am to some extent. How creative do you have to be to be a creative person? Wherever that bar is set, I'm brushing my shorts on it as I barely get over it. (That's a high jumping metaphor, for those of you who may be scratching your heads).

Do you like to sing?
Yeah. I sing every day. Sometimes Megan and I joke that our life is like a musical because we could break into song and dance at almost any moment.

How many songs are on your ipod?
I cleared it out not too long ago, so there are currently 1,527 songs on there.

What was the last movie you saw in theaters?
Megan and I just went and saw Prince Caspian last night. It was pretty good. I really need to reread the books.

What color are your pants?
They're pre-faded blue jeans. I would gladly settle for jeans that haven't already been worn in before I get them, but fashions being what they are, pants that are actually new are a little hard to come by.

What did you do to celebrate last Valentines Day?
I bought Megan a trophy and spent every last penny I had on dinner and presents.

Is your house clean?
It's clean-ish. We would straighten up if company was coming over, but if they came unannounced, we wouldn't be too embarassed.

How old are you?
29. And I just realized that I've been telling people I'm still 28. I had a birthday and forgot to factor in the fact that I'm older as a result.

Do you have any plants in your house?
We have a cactus named Chachi (different Chachi. I replaced old Chachi with a new model).

Are you afraid of getting old?
Not really. I was afraid of getting old as a single guy, but now that I'm married I think I can handle it a little better.

Who's in the room with you?
Megan was in the room, but now she's playing Super Mario Sunshine on the Game Cube. I think she like that game or somethin'.

Are you allergic to anything?
As far as I know I'm only allergic to pennicillin.


Well kids, there you have it. Another Friday, another meme.

The Moment You've All Been Waiting For!

Well, it's at least the moment I've been waiting for. We finally got our wedding pictures back from Lindy and she did a great job. I've uploaded a slideshow of some of the best images for your viewing pleasure. One of the disks was scratched really bad and I haven't been able to access any of the images, but we've got enough to make a decent slide show. If you would like copies of any of them let us know. I'm really excited because we have the rights to all the images so I can do anything I want with them.
Ahhh . . . I love Photoshop.

I know some of you are dying for a weekend update, so I'll give a short summation and I'm sure James with fill in all the gaps later. I know he's currently working on a monster blog that will update you with all the goings on lately.

We had a pretty great weekend. On Friday we had a quiet evening at home. I'm trying to remember exactly what we did but I'm pretty sure it involved several fun filled hours of watching Monk.
On Saturday we went and picked up a printer for my computer. It's a pretty nifty printer for $20. I found it on Craig's list and it has separate color cartridges so you can buy only the color you run out of which is kinda nice. It also has a pop-up touch screen where you can edit photos, check the job status or a great number of things. It also has a separate paper tray for photo paper so I can print my own 4x6 photos. That will come in handy since we just got all our wedding pictures back.

We also got to go to the temple on Saturday with my parents. Afterwards we went to dinner at the restaurant that made me fall in love with Thia food. That night our ward had an Elders Quoram party. It was great to get to know a lot of the couples in the ward again. It's also pretty great to feel like the kids again. I was starting to be considered pretty old in the singles wards by the time I left, but when people found out that I was 26 at the party, they looked at me like they didn't think people were born in 1981.

On Sunday I taught the Mia Maids class which is where they've decided to put me. Last week I was with the Beehives. The major difference I've noticed is that the Beehives are really chatty but their comments usually aren't related to the lesson. The Mia Maids already know that it's rude to be chatty but aren't quite to the point where they like to contribute a lot in class. So most of the class they just look really bored. This is a whole new ball game than teaching in Relief Society or Sunday School. Now I've got to find a way to be entertaining every week.

Well sorry for the abrupt end, but I best be off to work.

Megan